The FenReview
The road to God knows...
(03 Dec 2007)
Sometime back in May of 2007, one Von Allen announced that he had a few extra Galley proofs of his book The road to God knows... available to interested parties, left over from con. He and his wife had already "freinded" my LiveJournal sometime back, so it caught my interest and I requested one, promising a review. This is it!
Since then there have been several developments regarding this work (including the production of some prequel stories and Von's participation in an art show), and I finally set my deadline for the review for today.
Because today is the day that The road to God knows... goes up on Girlamatic.com! Updated four pages every Monday. This means it's part of the Girlamatic RSS Feed, so you can subscribe to it (along with other stuff) there.
I have a suspicion that his Galley proof may have had some kind of hand in getting him this deal with Girlamatic. That's what a Galley proof is for. You show it to publishers. So a review of something that is doing it's job may seem unimportant, except perhaps to learn what might be working.
Anyway, I'm going to structure my first few comic book reviews in a strict four point format that I learned from my favorite art instructors at Whatcom Community College (the University gave me nothin' but bitterness and a piece of paper). This is so that my readers can get a taste for my methods and possibly learn how a good critique works (the review is the whole thing, from the top of this article to the links at the bottom, the critique is what follows). In the future, I may put these questions at the top of the article with links and anchors as a kind of quick index:
What is the artist trying to do with this work?
What Von is trying to do with his Galley proof is obvious. He's trying to present his comic as quickly as he can in the best light he can in order to snag the interest of a publisher. There's very little fan service involved in this, and a lot more matterial on the informative side of things, like how to contact the author as soon as possible.
The road to god knows... comic proper, however, is a slightly tougher nut to crack. But Von attempts to demystify it with his promotional wording. It is a story about how a young girl tries to fulfill a small dream while coping with her mother's illness. However, upon reading it, it isn't so much a dramatic narrative as it is a slice of life. The moral isn't at the end of the story, it's in the meat of it, and told with a kind of strict honesty. This smacks of a purpose that is to accurately illustrate the way life works, perhaps based on personal experience or observation of someone else.
On the Girlamatic page, Von writes of his characters, "Their world can be a little tough at times, but that's pretty much the same for the rest of us, isn't it? Good times and bad? Highs and lows? Yeah...we all know that stuff, don't we?"
Finally, the other thing Von was trying to do, which I gathered from his Journal, was to create a graphic novel based on his passions, and in so doing learn how to do it. This is his first full book, and though we shouldn't let that color its merit, we should let that color our judgment of his prowess. Regardless of how skilled he was when working on any page of his book, an artist always has the ability to improve. But the first few projects often show leaps and bounds, as the larger pitfalls and obstacles are encountered and eventually grokked. Like a good comic author, you can get a taste of where Von is at by reading his journal (which he shares with his wife, who posts most of the time, really). They're both good people, so I recommend perusing it.
Anyway, these are the impressions that I had when I first encountered the work, based on its presentation and Von's own words. Von may explain himself more in the future, or even right now on the Girlamatic site. On with the meat of it!
What kind of impression does the work give me?
The story doesn't so much unfold as roll on from some unknown beginning toward some unknown end. The lead character, Marie, is a huge fan of Wrestling (with a big "W"). She takes it very seriously, and one day dreams of going to an actual event. Her troubles at school bring up the subject of living with her bi-polar mom, Betty, and she ends up discussing with her friend those troubles and her hopes at attending a nearby Wrestling event that looms on the horizon like a giant, enticing Twinkie. After trying to indoctrinate her friend with the wonders of Wrestling, they set out to get some tickets.
The one conclusion I can pull from the story is that her friend helps her not because she too ends up believing in the wonder of Wrestling, but because she believes in her friendship. It's a thin, tenuous thing, not because of any misunderstandings between them, but because it isn't a terribly old or deep friendship.
As I read the story, I tended to see things from Marie's point of view, and the reason for the strength of the friendship isn't very clear, nor should it be. She has so many things on her plate, and so much frustration, she doesn't have time to see what she has to offer to others.
So when the proof of it comes, it's kind of hard to believe but it's there, a plain fact, as plain and straight foward as any other event in the book. But something about the pacing does not make it a very poignant point, at least not as poignant as mainstream story telling has taught me to expect from what I read. But maybe we shouldn't always get what we expect.
All this was presented in a simple, perfect bound book, with not many extra frills. A word by Von himself is in there, presenting the work in short and thoughtful order. It looked like something I might expect to pull off a shelf in the bookstore, pretty close to the finished product, but with not much promotional material on it. However, the whole package struck me as a fully professional presentation, with a cover letter directed at me personally as well as a press packet of news concerning its publication and promotion status. Opening the envelope made me feel like I was finally part of the Industry (with a big "I").
About the time that I first had the book in my hand, Von was waffling on whether stark black and white worked better for the comic, or grayscale. I do remember thinking that I liked both styles and while the stark black and white read faster for some reason, the grayscale shading added a softness that induced a needed thoughtfulness to the scenes where it was used. I don't have the book handy at the moment to compare it to the Girlamatic site, but looking at the artwork there, it appears that Von has significantly touched up his work since the Galley. Either that, or it could be that my first impression was a bit more negative than my second. But I'm forgiving of artwork that I don't particularly like, especially when the artist appears to have put his heart into it as Von seems to have. That heart speaks far more than any technically accurate anatomy or kitchen counter.
What do I think is working for it?
I've pretty much said this above, but restating it here makes it more clear. The no frills, no fan fair, non-sensational presentation of the work does it justice, let's it sit on its own strengths and weaknesses, which for this piece is important. The subtle story should be read with few preconceived notions, other than perhaps a basic word as to it's purpose, and in my mind Von has done that.
Also, it's produced with heart, right from the overdone renderings of the character's mouths to the unwritten inner thoughts of Marie as she holds herself on the doorstep to her flat.
And believe it or not, Von's awkwardness with drawing his characters poses only serves to reflect their own awkwardness and thus strengthens the story telling.
Having known and befriended the children of mentally ill parents, I can tell this piece was written with knowledge. Von writes what he knows about, and it's obvious, which gives him the authority to tell his story.
And based on those strengths alone, I'd make this required reading for my Middle school English class, if I were to teach one. It's perfectly sophisticated enough for college sensibilities, and High schoolers could probably respect it more than Middle schoolers. But I'd want my 13 year old students to start thinking about it as a strong and interesting piece of writing as early as possible.
It may not be a pleasant read, but it is a very satisfying one. I recommend it to everyone.
What do I think the artist should do to improve the work, or do better work in the future?
Von's artwork is going to improve with time. It's appropriate for this piece, but more confidence and stronger composition and a better sense of perspective will all make his work more readily accessible to a wider number of readers and bring him more respect. It's just a kind of fact. And he should continue to work on these aspects of his art as he continues to create more comics.
Another thing he should do to improve this work, and anything else he does, is make more comics! Aside from the practice thing, the amount by which The road to God knows... improved with the addition of his prequel stories shows that he needs to get more of the story out. It seems to be a much longer piece than what he's told. Also, as he tells other stories, some more mainstream than others, he'll get a better grasp of the nuances of building tension and releasing it. And the more mainstream stories that he writes will only serve to bring attention to this one by virtue of being created by the same author. And I believe enough in road... to think that that would be a good thing.
I think he's already on the right track with telling shorter stories that are part of the greater whole, and I think he should write a few more (whether or not he ends up publishing them). I also think he should stick at least two of them in the back of the final print version of road... Even if they technically take place before the story begins, they are somewhat timeless and they stand alone. Putting them at the beginning might actually lesson the impact of the greater work as a whole.
Unfortunately, I don't have any advice as to how to make a Galley proof and its promotional packet more effective, as I am not that experienced in the Industry and Von's packet was impressive to me! Though I suspect improving the work proper is always the first bit advice anyone would give to anybody.
In any case, I'm eager to see how publication through Girlamatic pans out, and to read other people's take on his work. It's definitely worth the attention!
Other links of interest include:
Road to God knows... Facebook group
Park Dale Gallery - where Von's artwork is being hung
Comic Book Resources interviews Von Allen
And old press release from theOpenPress.com concerning his appearance at the 2007 Alternative Press Expo
Von Allen Studio
Posted by Fenmere
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